I have exactly seven days left to return to work from my maternity leave. I usually start pumping and storing breastmilk three weeks before I resume work from leave.
With my first daughter, it was smooth sailing.
I had no issues producing milk. I used to pump dry my two breasts in the morning for her first two feeds before leaving for working.
And by the time I get through the morning meetings in the office around 9am, my breasts will be heavy and full of milk.
I sometimes pumped twice at the office before I got off work at 3pm.
With my second daughter, recovery has taken longer than I imagined. My body is not like it used to be. Lately my breast doesn’t produce a lot of milk to have me pump the extra and store.
I have had to fall on formula after I exhausted my stored up breastmilk.
I have struggled to deal with the guilt of my body not producing enough milk for my second daughter. And the desire to do same if not better for my second daughter just as I did for my first.
You need to be in my place to understand. It is not as if formula feeding is bad, but it is a personal preference to breastfeed.
Thankfully, with only a week left to return to work, my body is back to producing milk like before and I cannot express in writing how happy that makes me.
To be able to pump more than 120ml from one breast is unexplainable.
I’m finally in a place where I have told myself that at any point before my daughter turns 6months if I need to supplement with formula,I’m still a good mother and I still love my second daughter just as much as I love my first.
Motherhood, the struggle is real.
nanaafriyie 